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We thought this email was worthy of public exposure! Each group has its own
personality, and this particular group (leader) is extra-special!
We think the new diver on the boat who received this information got more than
he bargained for!!
GROUP LEADER RULES
Dear Diver,
We select wreck sites via a time honored
system.
I consult the best available authority on
this subject ( Me) and I pick the locations.
This works out very well because it gives
everyone someone to blame ( Me) .I generally get blamed for at least some of the
following on each trip:
1.There is too much sun at this dive site
2.There is not enough sun at this dive site
3.We have dove this wreck too many times in the
past.
4.We never get to this wreck enough and I'm
pissed .
5.The water is too deep at this wreck site.
6.The water is too shallow at this wreck site.
7.This is just an artifact dive and we do too
many of these.
8. Damm it- we need to make more artifact
dives.
9.Why can't we do more lobster dives .
10. Screw the lobsters , I do not give a crap
about them.
11.I do not want to go to that far away wreck
as we will get back to the dock too late for dinner
12. I want to dive that far away wreck and
don't give a crap when we get back.
13.The A/C in the boat is making it too cold.
14.I'm sweating my balls off - crank up that
A/C.
15.I want to make a second dive on this wreck
because I just know I can find a major artifact.
16.I want the boat to move to a second
wreck because I am tired of the first one.
17.I will refuse to dive the _________ wreck as
I think it sucks.
18.I want to dive the ___________
wreck- hell, that why I came here ( Note that wreck in 17 is the same as wreck
in 18)
19.I want to dive only wrecks that have a lot
of sharks on them.
20.Screw the sharks ,I could care less about
them.
Get the point ?
I am ideally suited for this as I am totally
insensitive to any and all comments.My wife put it best when she observed that
my blood pressure is incredibly stable and normal while everyone around me has
high blood pressue.She concluded that I was a carrier of the malady and
therefore not able to contract it myself.
Having said the above, the most likely wrecks
to be visited on any of our N.Carolina trips ( not in any order of any priority
) would be:
Shurtz
Naeco
Caribe Sea
Atlas
Proteus
Tamaulipas
Cassimer
Papoose
Ashkabad
Manuela
Bedfordshire
Lobster Wreck
British Splendor
U 352
Senateur Duhammel
Clearly we will not get to most of these as we
have only 5 days and blowouts in N.Carolina are not uncommon.
I always try to get some variety in the mix and
to try to piss off everyone equally ( except for 1 diver who knows who he is).
Hard to believe, but we have been doing this
trip for about 20 years now and all attemps on my life have fallen short.
Sincerely,
your Group Leader (Dictator)
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